Regrets, I Have a Few

I found a great article in the June issue of Parents magazine. I laughed outloud as I was reading it and I thought that all mommies would get a chuckle out of it. If you have a minute, read it. It's funny. (Jason is reading it right now and is giggling like a girl.)

Regrets, I Have a Few

As for me, I'm not sure I'd say I have any regrets about becoming a parent, but there have been a lot of surprises.

1. Sleep - First, it's truly amazing to me how a mother's body can adjust to the amount of (or lack of) sleep you get with an infant in the house. Lesley is over 4 months old and she still wakes up at least twice a night. Argh... We'll get there, or she may never have a brother or sister.

2. Kitties - Our poor kitties are still in shock as to the new little person that lives in the house and gets ALL the attention they used to get. And, now that that little person tries to eat them, it's probably worse for them. All I can say about that is run away if you don't like Lesley pulling on your ears or your hair. She's not mobile yet. I always thought it was sad when people decided to give away their pets once they had children. Now, I can't even count the number of times I've said, "Can we just get rid of the cats?" They are annoying and they need attention that I can't give them. I'm sorry Linus and Charlie Brown, but at the end of the day after caring for a baby, I don't have the patience to deal with cat breathe, cat hair, or cat claws. And, I will continue to get mad if you wake me up in the middle of the night or in the morning when I'm sleeping. See #1. Sleep is IMPORTANT and hard to come by some days.

3. Pink - For those of you that know me, I'm not much of a pink person. I actually don't think I own anything pink (except for a bridesmaid dress I was forced to buy that I doubt I could locate right now). Well, with the addition of the cutest little girl ever, pink is now a must. Her closet is full of pink things and Jason has said on a few occassions, "she doesn't have to wear pink every day." Actually, she does. Also, he needs to get over it if we have to change her outfit multiple times a day. It happens (and it's fun). She has enough clothes and is growing so quickly, if she doesn't wear all the pink dresses now, we run the risk of them not fitting next week.

4. Date nights - Jason and I have found a new meaning to "staying in". We've been out alone just once I think. Date nights don't exist for us anymore. We did go to a movie last weekend. It was nice, but honestly, I felt guilty for going and leaving Lesley behind. People offer to babysit and watch Lesley, but really, I'd just rather stay home with her most days and weekends. Going to work is hard, so when I'm not at work, I want to be with her. Maybe as time goes on, I'll feel less guilty about leaving her and more excited to get out of the house with Jason, and just Jason.

5. Space - Babies are small but they come with a lot of stuff. My house was perfect when I purchased it. It was fine even after Jason moved in and we got cats. Now, it's tiny. We just moved the baby swing to the basement so we could bring the jumper upstairs. It fits nicely between the TV and dining room table, in front of the china hutch. One of my projects during my second maternity leave (long story, but I'm taking another 6 weeks off starting in 5 days) is to clean all the closets in the house and purge unnecessary items. Maybe that will create more space to store baby stuff. Or, maybe it will just help us get ready to sell the house next year so we can buy a bigger house with more space. Either way, I hope I find space in those closets.

Read the article, like I said, it's funny.

Just another pacifier

Still no luck with the sleep situation at the Carlin house. Lesley was up about 6 times last night...although I'll admit after 3 or so times, I lose track. We've got a couple theories on what's going on. First, we know her eczema bothers her at night. She now gets benadryl every night before bed - which she loves! But, by about 12-1am, she's up itching her head. A few times this week, she has scratched herself so much her head is bleeding by morning. We tried a hat for a couple nights but she managed to get that off. We've also tried mittens, but again, she escapes from those. I also put anohter layer of lotion on her head midway through the night. We are at a loss for how to stop the itching. Next step: call a dermatologist.

Our second theory involves the beloved swaddle blanket. (See photo below.) We got the swaddle blanket as a shower gift from our friends Matt and Laura. They swore by the blanket and used one for their son until he was 5-6 months old. It really does work wonders. At first, we were skeptical because Lesley would just scream as we wrapped her up tight. We soon learned though that if we fought it out and got the last fold tight, she would calm down immediately. And, when I say immediately, I meant in the blink of an eye. Amazing! Now that she is growing and therefore squirming more and more, the swaddling just doesn't last like it used to. In her early weeks of life, we could wrap her up and she'd stay put for 3-4 hours, pretty much until another feeding time. Now we are lucky if it lasts 30 minutes. Sad. Very sad. This means she wakes up and we go wrap her up and the process starts over. Hence the 6 times she needed "attention" last night. Jason can go into her room, wrap her back up, and she's out cold again, well for about another 30 minutes. We've been so careful not to let her get attached to a pacifier (we only offer it to her when she is really sleepy and even then she refuses it most of the time), but now we feel like we've created something equivalent to a pacifier addiction.

My dad often tells a story about what happened with my sister's pacifier. When she was about a year old, she was truly in love with the pacifier and needed it to sleep at night. One night, after getting up several times to reinsert the pacifier into Aimee's mouth to stop the crying, my dad decided he had had enough. He picked Aimee up, he picked the pacifier up, and he marched to the back door. He opened the door, told Aimee to say good-bye to the pacifier and proceeded to throw the pacifier out into the yard. That was the end of her addiction.

So, we are debating on whether to break her of the swaddled blanket habit. Jason is fine with letting her cry and forcing her to get over it, I'm still hesitant. And, many of you won't be surprised to read this, I hate to make her give up her blanket. I still sleep with my baby blanket and I've never been able to give it up, even with bribing from my mom, threats from my cousins, and comments from my husband. (In case you are wondering, I'm 28 years old and have been told I have a problem.)

The dilmena continues as we decide the fate of the swaddle blanket....I think the lack of sleep our house is currently experiencing may win this battle. Every day, the "cry it out" solution is sounding better and better to me.


Random snapshot...

Lesley was looking ultra cool in her sunglasses the other day. What a perfect way to ride around in a stroller on a neighborhood walk.

The Best Year Yet

I think Jason and I will both agree this year has been full of challenges, but even with my new grey hairs and Jason's continued loss of hair we'd still classify it as the best year of our marriage. Three years! Our wedding day still feels like it was just yesterday, yet we have so many more great memories now.

P.S. Congrats also to our friends Justin and Hilary who celebrate three years today. They had their second baby just two days ago and sweet Baby Kate is just another reminder of the love they share.

Say Cheese!

Every day it seems I say, "She never stops smiling!" Lesley truly is one of the happiest babies I've known. Yes, I'm biased, but seriously she makes friends with everyone! As an example, my mom and I went to the mall yesterday and no matter what store we were going into or out of, everyone would look down at the stroller and smile or remark about how happy the baby is to just ride along. We love it! Who wouldn't want a happy baby that's always smiling at you. She smiles when I go get her in the morning from her crib, she smiles when you say goodbye (which doesn't make the process any easier), she smiles when you get return from work, she smiles in the bathtub, and although she doesn't smile when you are putting lotion on her at night, she smiles when you are done and pick her up. We're even getting better at capturing the smiles on camera, and Grandma Nancy and Grandpa Keith love talking to her and catching some smiles on the webcam from time to time.

Today was a good day for us. We went to church, Jason mowed the yard while Lesley and I took a nap, we went for a walk to the park, I went to yoga for the first time in 2 months, then Jason's mom came over to watch Lesley while Jason and I went to a movie. We decided that was the first time we've been "out" by ourselves since Lesley arrived. It was fun sneaking pop and candy into the theater and buying the $4 matinee tickets and $6.50 tub of refillable popcorn. I was determined to eat two full tubs "to get our money's worth". It didn't happen, but I made a good attempt.

Here are a few photos from the weekend:

Lesley loved the new toy train I found at a garage sale. It makes noises and lights up! She wouldn't stop playing long enough for me to get a photo of her face.

Lesley spent lots of quality time with Grandma Nancy this weekend. Thanks for babysitting Friday! They sure wore her out which was evident since she was sound asleep at 5pm when I got home and didn't wake up until 7pm. She rarely takes that long of a nap.

What's this Grandma!? Can I have one!?
(No Grandpa Keith, it's not necessary to buy her a pink beebee gun yet.)

My dad said he was going to take Lesley to the zoo on Friday. Well, his type of zoo is Cabelas and he meant he was going to show her all the stuffed animals. Apparently she was a fan and liked looking around.

Jason's college friends Myles and Jacquie and their kids Sam, Max, and Will came to visit Friday night. Although they have moved to California, they were on vacation (driving from California all the way through Kansas to Memphis!) and stopped by to meet Lesley. Sam is 11, Max is almost 5, and Will is 13 months old. Will is quite the handful and opened my eyes to what having a mobile baby is going to be like. My favorite comment was when Jacquie looked at Myles and said, "Just don't let Will eat ALL the cat food." Yes, he found the cat food dishes and definately had a piece or two. Oops!

Here are a few shots of Miss Lilly I snatched from my mom's camera:

We can already hear Lesley saying, "But Lilly has 5 dogs and a horse...."

We need to keep an eye on Grandpa Keith. He feeds the girls "treats". Pretty sure I saw him feeding Lesley ice cream, whipped cream, and jello this weekend. I kindly reminded him that wasn't on the list of approved food from the doctor, but somehow I don't think that's going to stop him in the future. No wonder she doesn't like her cereal, it's not as tasty as ice cream.

Reasons Why I Like Being a Working Mother

I know I promised a blog about reasons why I hate being a working mom. Well, I've changed my mind and think this listing might be "healthier".

1. I want to give Lesley more space to play and have fun. Working now means we can hopefully get a bigger house in the future.

2. I want to be able and help Lesley pay for college. But, in order for that to happen, we need to pay off our own student loans first.

3. I want to set a good example for Lesley. She needs to know that in order to succeed, you must work hard.

4. It's good to have a reason to shower and dress in more than jeans and a tee-shirt every day. That was the story of my maternity leave. (NOTE: Showering meant it was a good day - there were definately days when I didn't get out of my pajamas.)

5. Once Lesley starts daycare, she will have lots of opportunities to play with other kids and meet new people. I can already tell, she is a social butterfly and will love visiting others.

The list is short, but hopefully I'll be able to add to it as more time goes by.

Lesley did a good job with her cereal tonight. She has been refusing the cereal for several days now, so we decided to give oatmeal a try. I think she liked it since she finished her bowl quickly and we even mixed up more since she was whining and appeared to want more. She finished the second bowl as well! Granted, these are not huge bowls, but still she probably ate more tonight than she's eaten in total over the past week.

It appears she will be able to feed herself soon. We wish!

Katie has class tomorrow and an interview Friday. This means Lesley gets to spend Thursday with Aunt Denise and my parents are driving down to babysit Friday. They were planning to visit anyway so when Katie's interview came up, my mom convinced my dad that Lesley needed to spend the day with her Grandma and Grandpa. Grandpa Keith promised Lesley that they will go look at pink beebee guns at Cabelas. The rest of the week will be fun for Lesley!

Roll Baby Roll!

Finally! We have success!

Daddy is the coolest person EVER! Don't be fooled though, Lesley still loves Mommy the most. Daddy is just funnier than Mommy and can always make Lesley smile.


Lesley loved sitting in a big girl chair at dinner last night with Ashlynn. We went out to eat with our friends Justin and Hilary to celebrate our anniversary. They got married the same day we did and since they will be welcoming their second baby in a few days, we decided to celebrate a little early. The batteries in our camera went dead between the photo of the girls and the group shot, which is why we had to use a cell phone for our photo.

Lesley and I went to hang out with our friends Kate and Evan. Apparently the swimming pool is exhausting for these kiddos. They both feel asleep - Lesley is the floaty and Evan in his Mommy's arms.

Grandpa Raymond and Grandma Billie gave this fun outfit to Lesley for her birthday. Luckily we pulled it out now, she's not 6 months old yet but she sure fits in to the 6 month clothes. (Note that the outfit only lasted about 3 hours before we had a diaper blow out - but so cute and she'll be wearing it again soon!)

Not "my" baby anymore

While I was pregnant, Jason would ask how his baby was doing and I would always grin and respond, "No, it's my baby." As I was getting her ready for bed tonight, it hit me how much she's grown. It's not as easy to cuddle with her at night, swaddling her is pretty difficult as she always escapes, and we don't fit in the rocking chair while I feed her like we used to. She's not "my" baby anymore, she's getting to be a big girl. She doesn't like laying back in your lap, she's very persistent and wants to sit up to see what's going on in the world. She loves sitting in her high chair at the table with us, and her gaze will follow you around the room and she turns her head if she hears your voice - especially daddy's voice. She is really starting to LOVE her daddy because he's fun to play with and takes such good care of her. He constantly makes funny faces at her, blows on her belly, is the best at giving baths, and gets her dressed every morning.

Lesley will be four months old tomorrow! We had a checkup with the doctor and here are her current stats:

14.6 pounds (70th percentile)
25 inches (75th percentile)
head - 42.5 cm (85th percentile)

Her growth has slowed a bit since she was in higher percentiles last visit. The doctor wasn't too happy about her eczema so we have more ideas on how to control the itchiness. She even thinks that maybe it's the eczema keeping her awake at night - she's itchy and inadvertently wakes herself up trying to scratch her head or her face. We are going to try Benadryl before bedtime and giving her baths at least every day. She actually suggested baths twice a day, but that's not really going to work with our schedule.

Quick story - Last night around 9:30pm this is the conversation I had with Jason.

Abby: "If I go to bed right now, I can get 2.5 hours of sleep before Lesley wakes up."
Jason with a confused look on his face: "What do you mean?"
Abby: "Well, there's 2.5 hours before midnight, right?"
Jason: "Yes, but she doesn't wake up until 3am."
Abby thinking that Jason is joking: "Lesley wakes up at midnight AND at 3 am AND usually around 5am."
Jason: "I thought she was only waking up at 3 am."
Abby with tears in her eyes: "Are you kidding me? She has been waking up at midnight and 3 am for the past 4 weeks. You're telling me you didn't know that? Why do you think I've been so exhausted and asking for help."

NOTE: Jason does not wake up for ANYTHING, and rarely recalls me ever trying to wake him up. He is a great daddy and helps a ton between the hours of 7am-9pm, just not so much during the night. He felt really bad when he realized I wasn't joking about Lesley's late night schedule.

Here kitty, kitty, kitty....I want to eat you!

Mommy's home! The best part of my day is coming home from work, always greeted with a smiley (although sometimes tired) baby girl. She's not exactly smiling in this photo, but she was before the camera came out.

Lesley spends a lot of time on her activity mat. She's a huge fan - and so are Mommy and Daddy since the animals can entertain her for a long time.

Weekend of Firsts

Lesley had her first cold this weekend. Not fun! Friday night was rough with not a lot of sleep for Lesley or for me. Luckily, we were both able to take a morning AND an afternoon nap. Daddy has gotten good at using the "boogie" sucker. Lesley HATES it, but in the end, she can breathe so much better. We had to go back to swaddling Saturday night in order to get her to sleep for more than 15-20 minutes at a time. She is currently swaddled in her crib, and has been asleep for over 2 hours. Yeah! I guess we'll continue to swaddle her for now, at least until her cold is over and she's up to sleeping on her own again.

With her cold, we spent her first 4th of July at home, doing a lot of nothing. She's too young to have enjoyed fireworks or barbequeing anyway. Hopefully next year!

We decided to try Lesley with some rice cereal for the first time. She continues to wake up at least twice a night to eat so who knows, maybe a little rice cereal will help her sleep longer at night. She's also shown a lot of interest in eating our food and continually opens her mouth when we eat and reaches for our plates. Round one went really well - she finished the whole bowl of soupy cereal. Tonight wasn't quite as good, but we were trying to show Grandma and Grandpa Holtz what a big girl she was. We had the webcam going and G&G kept encouraging her finish her bowl. We'll get there, and soon I hope to report that Lesley is sleeping through the night.

Bath Night at the Carlin House

Tonight was bath night at our house....here's how it went down:

Lesley enjoying some time with Luke and her "Itsy Bitsy Spider" book. Grandpa Keith says the spider looks more like a tick but that doesn't fit the story as well so we stick with spider in the story. She's getting good at sitting up with only a little support. Just a few face plants from time to time. Notice that she's already wearing a sleeper even before bathtime. We had a rough morning in church (she spit up a lot and peed all over herself), so once we got home, we put her in a sleeper and called it good. Who wouldn't want to spend their Sunday in pj's, right?

A little airplane action with Daddy.

"Okay Daddy, you took my clothes off and now I've got your lip. I'm ready for my bath!"

Lesley loves her Daddy.

"Come on Charlie Brown, the water is perfect. We don't have enough letters to spell your name though, sorry. You can play with my whale or alligator though."

And finally, Daddy is the designated lotion person. I'm not as good at getting the right amount of lotion and cream on Lesley, so that's pretty much Daddy's job every night. We also listen to my yoga CD that I got last fall when pre-natal yoga classes started. It seems to calm Lesley before bedtime. I listened to the CD almost every morning on my way to work while I was pregnant, it seemed to be a good way to start my day and help me stay focused on the important things in my life during some busy, stressful days (weeks) at work.

Around the House

Daddy sure makes a good place to cuddle with in the morning while mommy gets ready for work. After Mommy gets ready, she feeds Lesley and heads to work. Daddy gets Lesley ready for the fun day with Cousin Katie.

Here Linus, do you want to play with the rings too?

She was trying to share so badly with Linus that she basically rolled over. I think we can say that her first "roll over". She never did figure out how to get her arm from under her, but it was a good attempt. She is starting to tolerate her belly time so maybe we'll get a roll from her stomach to her back soon.

This was actually last weekend at Lake Icaria (I forgot to post with the rest of the photos). When we returned from the boat ride, this is how we found her sleeping. Grandpa Keith did a good job with nap time.

Caught this on video today...cracks us up!

Lesley is doing really great and continues to amaze us every day. There's always something new. Just this morning we were at the mall walking and she was very content in the stroller, chewing on the shoulder straps. She eventually starting "chatting" and went on and on for close to 30 minutes. People would peek into the stroller to see where all the noise was coming from, we thought that was funny. She sure had a lot to say this morning! The trip to the mall wore her out because she took almost a 3 hour nap when we returned home.

She's now waking up THREE times at night. What happened to our baby who would sleep 6-7 hours at a time? When this started I kept saying it's just a growth spurt, but that started over three weeks ago and continues. Her eating and napping is inconsistent during the days while Katie is here. I did witness her drinking two 4 ounce bottles from Jason today so we know she can do it. I think soon we will start on rice cereal and see if that helps her sleep longer at night. Not sure how much longer I can handle getting up with her twice, and waking Jason to handle the situation once.

We have started to lay her down before she's asleep and letting her fuss a little before dozing off. So far, it has been working really well assuming we catch her at a tired, but not overtired stage. She also likes to hug/kiss the colorful caterpillar from Katie while she's "preparing" for sleep at night. Whatever, it works so we'll let her do it. We've got her four month check up with the doctor this week. It will be interesting to see how much she weighs - we just packed away a box full of newborn clothes. Amazing how much she's already outgrown.

Lake Icaria with the Hoffmann's

We had a great weekend at Lake Icaria with the Hoffmann family. It was our first camping trip with Lesley...and, the word camping is strong since we stayed in a cabin with air conditioning. But, nonetheless, Lesley got to experience more of the outdoors than she's ever done before. Luckily the weather wasn't too hot and we didn't have any eczema outbreaks. Here are some of our favorite photos from the weekend.

Cousin Audra is the best! She wasn't sure so about Lesley after she spit up all over her though.

"Look mom! Lilly let me play in her exersaucer. I love the kitty, horse, and cow sounds it makes."

Grandpa Keith thought it would be a good idea to see if Lesley liked mashed potatoes. Boy did she ever! Her digestive system was not a fan and it took a few days to get on schedule, but it showed us she's ready for rice cereal. She had the whole open mouth, bite down, suck/chew, and swallow down pat.

"I need more, please. Look, I can even feed myself."

Grandma and Grandpa were in charge of the girls when Aimee, Mike, Jason and myself went out on the boat. As you can see, Lilly loves the outdoors and couldn't keep her eyes off the trees. Lesley, well, she was just confused at times but overall I think she enjoyed the weekend.

Bundled up with Cousin Ady and hanging out with Aunt Barb. It was chilly on Sunday morning.

Lesley thought it was pretty cool to be in her swimsuit, hat and shades while chilling in the pool. She loved sitting in the bumbo seat and getting her feet wet. Thanks Grandma for bringing the swimming pool for Lilly and Lesley.

Lilly really loved the water whereas Lesley wasn't quite as big of a fan once her diaper got wet. She only tolerated it for a little bit.

The girls chilling out and enjoying each other's company. Note this picture was taken before Lilly got a hold of Lesley's big ear. If you haven't heard, Lesley has one ear that sticks out a bit. Despite the many suggestions from our beloved family, we will not be duck taping it to her head.

There's that cool Cousin Audra again.

Uncle Nick and Jason took a stroll around the lake in the canoe. We certainly heard about their sore muscles the next day.

Here's a photo of one of the cabins before meal time.